he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I Just paid off the bartender to help me convince this chic my roommate's gay. This is the best cockblock ever.
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He's not actually Jewish. Turns out he just wears the yarmulke to cover his bald spot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
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