Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
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You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
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TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
And then you poured the rest of the vodka into salsa and added the alcohol soaked pineapples and grapes and said "don't touch my salsa breakfast".
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