do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the guy who is making our IDs is in jail now for attempted murder, with no bail...
So no fakes?
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
I'm going to three dry weddings this month. I'm flashing three dry weddings this month
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Randomize