So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
i'm using a wine bottle as a spitter. how classy is that.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He cooked me dinner. I showed my appreciation by showing up shithoused and breaking a bottle of steak sauce on his floor.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
Lemme guess, I was the one completely shit faced making out with the 50 year old...
LOL, wrong number bro. Good luck trying to figure out what happened though..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
Randomize