I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
When this bachelor party is over and your life is in ruins, you have my permission to die.
I don't think the best pickup line was. Hey I have never made a girl orgasm before but I'm sure it will work on someone like you.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I feel as if some line has been crossed, but only in this vague, WTF sort of way.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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