I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you're the only person I know who would bring a water bottle of screwdriver to a wedding, and toast with it during the speech
Listen to me plotting my whoredom.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
He just kept going down on me. And he was all like, do you mind? No motha fucka, who would? All of his ex's, apparently. Whatever, he's a gem and I'm keeping him.
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