You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Are you saying I'm your favorite hot mess?
I'm actually my favorite my hot mess, but you're a close second.
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I’ve basically been controlling him with my tits for months now, so I can’t even imagine what would happen if I start banging him
Randomize