so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Why do I have a vague memory of your entire fraternity climbing in through my bedroom window?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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