Where did you get a picture of my penis
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
You went to a drug deal in a onesie.
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize