my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
Please be advised that because of last year's "incident" we will no be starting St. Pat's day with spicy breakfast burritos and car bombs. Please plan accordingly.
Just saw a tranny in a skimpy captain america costume walking around campus. Going to follow her. You gotta see this
Even though he had a fractured vertebrae, the sex was still phenomenal. Better than normal actually. I hope the vertabrae never heals.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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