Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
Mom just apologized for her lack of a gag reflex not being genetic.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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