i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
This is amazing. I can pinpoint the window in time that you lost all sanity.
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He told me that his greatest skill was making White Russians.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
Randomize