No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
Do you know how easy it would be to shoplift if I was a magician?!
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Help me help you realize you are a moron
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
Randomize