I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Why can't burritos get me drunk
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Feels weird riding an elevator with my tongue in my own mouth.
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
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