OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
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I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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