My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was like eating out sand paper
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
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