i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wanna introduce you to my balls, Thunder and Lightning.
We are a team. I lure them in with my tits, feed them enough alcohol to consider homosexuality, and hand them off to you.
You're the best wingman ever.
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
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