I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
I fukin lobve the states. Girls here let me fuck them because they like my accent. I may not go back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
My little brother came home while I was sitting there icing my vagina with a bag of peas. Asshole looks at me, high fives Ryan, then leaves.
All you need for a happy life is Jameson and slippers
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
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