I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize