I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
We had to put his head at the bottom of the driveway so the puke would run down. Now he's sleeping outside.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Debating whether the Plan B I had this morning would go under breakfast or lunch in my food log.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Shut the fuck up! I can hear you having sex over Pirates of the Caribbean you moaning whore.
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