yeah...it smells like an asshole would smell if someone ate sewage.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You know what's worse than asking for the morning after pill? Asking for the morning after pill in a sketchy hospital in a foreign country where no one speaks English.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No memories of receiving this. Or of getting home. Or of apparently developing a taste for marmalade, which I assume is yours because I have literally never eaten it before. It's all over the kitchen. And my phone. And in my hair. Oh god I wish I wasn't on the train to work. X And sorry about the kitchen x
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
Fucked a kid by the name of your hometown tonight... FOR THE WIN.. BF4L
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
Randomize