apparentely "Beer Pong Champ" is not a profession, no wonder they havent called me back......
told ya
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
Just got off the phone with poison control. They're more concerned about our alcohol intake than that the beer bong was last cleaned with pine sol.
Ate apple sauce off his penis. Nutritious and slutty.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Note to self. Don't order a $10 bottle of wine on a 40 min flight because it seems like a good deal.
God you're perfect.
I am. So drunk right now. Good work, Frontier.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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