No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I couldnt decide if i wanted to pee first or vomit. So i Peed sideways while throwing up into the tub.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
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On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I made mike pull over so I could lay in the grass. He made me get up cuz I looked dead and people were passing. It was like 6:30am.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
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I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
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