We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
So... remember when you threw an orange in the closet when we were 16 to make wine? Just found it. Not wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize