U r making out with a 12 year old get ur shit together
also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
Found a pint glass in my snow pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Apparently i'm now known as the kid who was double fisting tequila and pedialyte.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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