Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I have got to lose weight!! Apparently no one wants to fuck a fat chick with herpes.
I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
hey watch out, they threw flour on everyone who passed out at their party last year.
Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
When they send me to rehab, I'm screaming your name down the halls.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
She sent me nudes via email. What the fuck are we still in the 90s? Grow up
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
Randomize