could you grab mr moo while you're at his apt?
you brought your stuffed animal to a booty call?
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You're my spirit guide. This has to do with oatmeal cream pies.
According to FB I fucked in a field 365 days ago.
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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