Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
totally poinked my lawyers daughter in his hot tub last night. i figure getting off is just compensation for not getting me off.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Fuck you. I've got onesies to keep me warm at night. And this bottle.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize