i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
just had Stella and stale goldfish for breakfast under the watchful eyes of an inflatable cactus and 5 llama pinatas. Cinco de mayo success!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
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