Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Vibrator and massage oils got stopped at security. Super.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Feel better punkin. Your balls will be gently resting on my forehead in no time
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
we can no longer cook chicken in the house. his name is herbert, we are keeping him and can not eat his people in front of him.
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
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