do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
smoking a cig and getting head on the last night of my cruise. and she doesn't mind that i'm texting you right now. this is now on my list of top 10 nights of my life.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She just opened a six pack of corona with her car door ... I had no idea she was such a skilled drunk
She tried to sit inside the drawer to my dresser and when it broke, she burst into tears calling herself fat. Too high to deal with this
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
I'm about to play another round of who's panties are in my car.
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
He only has one ball. it was like fucking a cyclops.
Randomize