hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went on an adventure and now we have more food.
Well, really we just have fire sauce and cookies. But they're edible.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
He fell asleep on top of me after sex. For 3 hours. Poor guy worked too hard.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
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Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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