Hi, my name's audrey!
Max?
Sorry, this girl is phone-stealing drunk.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
safety first
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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