The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
The online application for Mcdonald's said I could do incredible things there. Today I threw out shit filled underwear in the women's restroom and escorted a very drunk/high 42 year old man outside after he ordered a 5 dollar foot long and a bloody mary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
230 lb girl across the train from me is giving a dude in a kilt a handjob while he sits in her lap
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the only way to get approved without a guarantor.
WHAT DOES THAT MEAN WHAT FUCKING LANGUAGE ARE YOU SPEAKING
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
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