i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
our night together was a product of my beer goggles and jennifer aniston-like desperation.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
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