Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
i shall enjoy my approximately 2 hours of being sober today
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
The last thing I remember is crying and shaking my head as she was putting salt on my hand. I guess I took the shot
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I've never had someone have to dis-arm themselves before I sucked their dick prior to that
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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