Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
I love you
are you drunk
yes but I def love you, we should get married
But I'm Jewish
embrace Jesus
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
I realized tonight the smell of my dirty pads remind me of my grandfather.
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Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
I kinda wish he had even a slight idea of the sex I'm planning for his departure. I'm literally studying for it.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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