I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
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