thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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