R and i have drinken 4 bottles od red wine. By ourselfs
Vanillla milkshakes are the new Gold Bond. Will explain later.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I guess calling a coworker a lesbian sea cow is some kind of violation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
it's 8 a.m. and there are people having sex at the foot of the strangers bed i'm in. the guy just asked the girl how she lost her baby weight so fast.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
tell me about the fingering
Randomize