That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
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She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
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DOMA is dead. I'm definitely going to be the last of our friends to get married now.
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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