addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
i now understand why vodka
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
I love FaceTime, every time you ring me the morning after its like I went home with your one night stand too.
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