I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude just texted me asking if I could drive 45 mins for a quickie dude use your hand
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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