I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
Laughlin, where retired strippers come to die.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im going to need an iv of taco bell after this.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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