It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
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I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
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I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
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