She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I’m 95% positive I adopted a bunny last night.
You had cocktails, didn’t you?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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