Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
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