Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
New beer pong partner names "Bus Boys" ... We clear tables
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im at a party and this guy hitting on me just showed me his 'caution choking hazard' tattoo right above his penis. There goes any chance he had of getting laid tonight.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the minute she broke up with me. If you're receiving this mass text, you are one for the girls who made me promise to text you at this point.
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize