NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Randomize