Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
Let's just go topless and paint glitter over our nipples who the fuck cares
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
I JUST SENT A TOILET SELFIE TO THE WRONG PERSON.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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